I totally realize pregnancy can be a touchy subject. Please do not mistake my honesty and the sharing of my inner thoughts as me seeming ungrateful or unappreciative to have a body that can carry another being. I could not feel more blessed to carry my second baby. However, this post does share my emotional roller coaster of sharing my body for another 9 months when first finding out our big news.
So, my adorable and spunky firecracker of a son is 13 months old. My husband and I knew we wanted kids close in age (ideally 2 years apart), so we knew we needed to start thinking about trying for a second baby.
Eeek! Now don’t get me wrong mommas, I love babies just as much as the next mother, but having to share my body for another 9 months (really more like 2 years once I finish breastfeeding) isn’t exactly exhilarating to me.
I smile when I think of rocking a bump, feeling the baby move, it having hiccups, but I enjoy a Xanex and a glass of wine just as much as the next normal mother. Congratulations if pregnancy doesn’t cause you to make some lifestyle changes…You’re a saint.
Carrying a baby for another 9 months is a serious commitment for me. I take pregnancy super seriously and feel that it is my responsibility to live the most healthy and wholesome lifestyle both mentally and physically that I can while growing another human.
Well s***…I had just started to really come into my own again as not only a mother but also my same self. When I first found out I was pregnant with Barrett (my first born), I changed my whole life and prepared for motherhood. Now, that he is a toddler I have finally realized that I am still me, just with more responsibility, and a gorgeous son on my hip. Another words, yes, I’m a mother and wife, but I’m also still “Sarah”.
I had kinda lost myself in the shuffle of morphing into a mother, that I thought that is all I was.
So here I am finally in a good rhythm, and pump the brakes…I’m pregnant again. How do I adjust to sharing my body, raising my son, being a wife, and still taking care of my own soul?
I take it one day at a time. I’m not the first or last mother to welcome more than one offspring into the world. It is the best blessing there is, and at the same time there is no need to feel guilty that I’m not 150% ecstatic to be pregnant again. It is ok to have some reserves and feel selfish sometimes. I’m human.
In the meantime, bring it on baby #2. I’m going to nest up a storm waiting for your arrival, and I genuinely cannot wait to meet you.