What in the hell do you say to a prego? It’s a bit hard to act like you don’t notice she suddenly has a bit of a tummy on her. Is she or isn’t she?
And NO ONE wants to be that a**h*** who mistakenly assumes someone is pregnant.
So, after talking to my preggy friends, I have come up with a list of crap to NOT say, and then ways to totally politely discuss the topic.
THINGS TO NEVER SAY
+ “So you’re due like tomorrow, right?”
You might be super confident in your little assessment, but she is NOT due in the next 24-hours. You’re just going to confirm to her how big she really is.
+ “Wow, are you expecting twins?”
This has been a comment multiple friends of mine have received. For the love of God, this is so rude. EVERYBODY carries babies differently. Some people carry like Gisele Bündchen, and the rest of the pregos in the world feel like hippos by the time they deliver. This is not a funny comment no matter how much giggling you accompany it with.
+ “You must be like 8 months along!”
In actuality she is 6 months, and hasn’t even really started to get plump, so shut up. Once again your assessment is dead wrong, and you basically just told her she’s too big for where she is at in her pregnancy. Smooth move.
+ “You are SO big, I can’t even believe it!”
Again, not the most endearing comment. She knows she is the size of a planet. You telling her this is not a news flash, but is more likely to make her feel self-conscious. And, ya she’s big…she is only lugging around another human, placenta, and amniotic fluid.
+ “Oh, you’re not even half-way yet!”
Oh, gee thanks for the reminder. She already feels like she has been pregnant forever and a day, and you just reminded her she has at least another 20 weeks left to go. Don’t be a negative Nancy, but instead a positive Pam, please!
+ “So when are you due?”
I have been asked this days after delivering my son while on a quick run to Target. Make triple sure she is pregnant before speaking this seemingly harmless question. Moms still look QUITE pregnant right after their baby is born, while their uterus is contracting back down to it’s original size. There are also the moms who haven’t lost the baby weight yet, but have toddlers. Just don’t be the person who assumes they are pregnant.
+ “How far along are you?”
Once again, make sure she is pregnant before you ask this seemingly harmless comment. If she is for sure pregnant, GREAT QUESTION as pregnant women love to discuss their pregnancy! But if you are using your “expert” analysis, think again!
SAY THIS INSTEAD
+ “Do you have any kids?”
This is the perfect opportunity for them to let you know they are pregnant, or that they have a 2 year old and just haven’t lost the baby weight. You remain a nice person, and haven’t just told someone they are unnecessarily large.
+ “You carry so well.”
Obviously say this if they have already confirmed their pregnancy. That disclaimer being noted, I really feel like this is the best compliment you can give a preggy. They are clearly larger than they normally are sans baby, so make them feel like they at least pull the look off.
+ “You’re glowing.”
She likely feels hormonal as hell and is sweating as you are speaking to her. Telling her she has a glow will make her feel radiant.
Hope this helps you be less awkward or reassures you that you are one polite individual! Comment below with crazy comments you have heard or personally received while preggy!
For more ridiculous comments people say to pregnant people, view these posts: